"Uncle Brian! I got you a piggy bank! It big! I buyed it for you!"
(To get the proper effect, read the line above out loud. In your most wide-eyed excited voice. As loudly as you can without shouting, while jumping rapidly up & down and laughing at the same time. Now you have an idea what it really sounded like.)
I kinda-sorta knew about the gift in advance because certain close female relatives who shall remain nameless but bears a striking resemblance to my mother and sister had both told me a day or two earlier, but I was thinking, well... Piggy bank. One of those little things you hold in one hand. I hope it's got a plug in the bottom so it doesn't have to be broken to get coins out... I can probably fit it into the curio cabinet in the living room where I can see it & she'll be able to when she comes over...
Fast-forward to early Saturday evening. We'd planned to get together for a little family birthday celebration, nothing fancy, just dinner and cake and happy time together, and amazingly things were working out according to plan. Oh, yeah, I got to my folks' house about 15 minutes later than planned as usual, but there was AJ out in the driveway, using her brother's expected late arrival to give the Pipsqueak a few minutes' extra nap time in her car seat. Miri was (also as usual) a little slow to wake up, but once she got her engine revving she didn't miss an opportunity to tell me about the piggy bank she buyed for me. (Note: Yes, we did indeed attempt to substitute "bought" for "buyed" but even Grandma The Retired English Teacher failed to put a dent in that enthusiastic refrain.)
A quick aside: The Pipsqueak was quite thoroughly impressed with my birthday cake. It was an extra-yummy Belgian chocolate number she caught sight of before dinner while "helping" me locate something in the fridge for Mom; she subsequently spent most of dinner asking if she could have soon, as in right now, and why not, Mommy? She helped me blow out my candles (and was quite proud of doing so), and was happy to loudly sing "Happy Birthday" and dig into all that chocolatey goodness...
...but she simply couldn't wait to give me my gift, the afore-and-frequently-mentioned piggy bank. I started to wonder about it when I saw it was in one of those gift bags that's as big as a full-scale grocery bag, and then Miri was ignoring her Mommy's pleas to "let Uncle Brian unwrap his gift himself, honey" and pulling the tissue paper out of the bag.
My niece hadn't buyed me a piggy bank.
The Pipsqueak had buyed me a PIGGY BANK.
I mean, the thing's ginormous. It's larger than most real piglets, bigger than one of AJ's cats, bigger than the odd yappy Chihuahua-based hybrid creature my former next door neighbors owned. I can't put it in the curio cabinet because if I do, the doors can't close.
I've promised AJ that my niece's loving gift will be prominently displayed where the Pipsqueak will easily see it next time she comes over... and am now scrambling to figure out where the heck to put it.
|The piggy bank (12oz soda can included as size reference)|